Poor Preacher
穷困潦倒的传教士
After the church service a little boy told the pastor, "When I grow up, I'm going to give you some money."
礼拜后男孩问牧师：“我长大后会给你一些钱。”
"Well, thank you," the pastor replied, "but why?"
“好啊，谢谢你。”牧师回答道：“不过为什么?”
"Because my daddy says you're one of the poorest preachers we've ever had."
“因为我爸爸说你是我们见过的最穷的传教士之一。”
Setting the Table
摆桌子
Little Susan was mother's helper. She helped set the table when guests were due for dinner. Presently everything was on, the guest came in, and everyone sat down. Then Mother noticed something was missing.
小苏珊是妈妈的好帮手。她在有客人来家里就餐时帮忙摆桌子。现在一切准备就绪，客人走进，所有人都坐好了。妈妈突然发现缺了什么。
"Susan," she said, "You didn't put a knife and fork at Mr. Smith's place."
“苏珊。”她说道：“你忘了在史密斯先生那里放刀叉了。”
"I thought he wouldn't need them," explained Susan.
“我以为他不需要那些。”苏珊解释道。
"Daddy says he always eats like a horse!"
“爸爸说他总是吃得像马一样!”
Penny Trick
一便士的小把戏
After tucking their three-year-old child Sammy in for bed one night, his parents heard sobbing coming from his room.
某晚，在把三岁宝宝山米放到床上后，他的父母听到啜泣声从他的房间传来。
Rushing back in, they found him crying hysterically. He managed to tell them that he had swallowed a penny and he was sure he was going to die. No amount of talking was helping.
冲进屋内后，他们看见他正嚎啕大哭着。他成功告诉他们他吞下了一便士一定活不成了。说什么都无济于事。
His father, in an attempt to calm him down, palmed a penny from his pocket and pretended to pull it from Sammy's ear. Sammy was delighted.
他的父亲，试图让他冷静下来。他从口袋中掏出一便士，在山米的耳边假装要把它拿过来。山米很开心。
In a flash, he snatched it from his father's hand, swallowed, and then cheerfully demanded, "Do it again, Dad!"
山米以迅雷不及掩耳盗铃之将钱从父亲手中夺过，吞下，然后高兴的要求道：“再来一遍，爸爸!”